People Who Annoy Me at the Gym: Revisited

So a few months ago, I wrote a post about the people at the gym who annoy me because they clearly don’t know what they’re doing. Well, after some more gym visits and discussions with my gym buddy, we have come up with a few additions to the list. If you do these things, be warned: you have a target on your back and no one likes you.

1. It’s a workout, not a fashion show.

Yeah, sometimes girls forget to take off their makeup before they go to the gym. Yeah, sometimes one outfit looks better than another. But when you’re going through the gym looking like Nicki Minaj – you need to stop. During one of our exercise classes, a girl graced us with her presence. I put it that way because she clearly had just put on a thick amount of makeup and spent more time adjusting her outfit than actually participating in the class. Girls – nobody looks hot when they workout. If you are one of the few that still looks somewhat cute after sweating all over a machine, I commend and hate you at the same time. But don’t use the gym as an excuse to show off those super tight yoga pants you just bought, especially when you’re not doing anything to ensure that they will fit after your next “well I went to the gym so I can eat this” pint of ice cream.

2. If I wanted to hear someone stomping, I would go see “Stomp” on broadway.

If you don’t know how to properly run on a treadmill – get out. That’s all I have to say. If you really think it’s healthy for your joints to slam your feet down on the machine as you “run,” then you need to reevaluate your life. Not only is it not healthy for you, it’s loud and annoying as all heck. The worst is when I can hear the slamming of your tacky, neon tie-dyed Asics on the trackpad over the music pumping through my headphones. Seriously, replace those cement bricks you call feet and learn how to run on the machine correctly.

3. Yeah, go ahead. Throw the weights. You’re a badass now.

This is just disrespectful to the gym and the people who actually go there. Not only that, but it can lead to possible injuries and damage the area where you so carelessly decided to chuck them. Honestly, when I see someone throw weights I think of only two things: they were lifting way more than they should be or not enough people were paying attention to their mad skills so they had to bring the noise. Other meatheads will just think that you don’t know how to properly use the equipment/control your body, so at least I’m giving you options as to why I think you’re being a jerk. Just stop it before someone 2x your size beats you up.

4. That machine is for you to exercise on, not to prop you up.

There is nothing more aggravating than going to use the leg press but stopped because someone else is using it… as a device to hover over and lean on. I know you’re not planning on using it, mister chicken legs, but would you be so kind as to not shoo others away just because you want to buzz around it like a pesky fly? That’d be great.

5. WEAR SOME FREAKING DEODORANT.

Nothing is more repulsive and disgusting than people who do not wear deodorant to the gym. Or maybe they didn’t wash their workout clothes from yesterday, who knows. Either way – ya stink and you’re ruining my workout because I have to change my breathing habits to avoid gagging due to your horrendous B.O. There’s a distinct difference between smelling bad because you’re working out and smelling bad because you don’t know what deodorant, soap, and a washing machine are.

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