I am going kick this off with two assumptions:
- You all know what Duck Dynasty is. (It’s already completed three seasons)
- You all know that Ryan Lochte is quite possibly the dumbest human on the planet.
Honestly, I am not a reality TV type of person. I will watch sitcoms and dramas until I can no longer move off the couch, but as soon as that channel changes to something like ‘Catfish’ or ‘The Kardashians’ I am out of the living room faster than the speed of light. I just really can’t stand the stupidity of human nature, let alone being forced to watch people be famous for really nothing… and yes, Kim, I’m calling your “sex tape” nothing.
With that being said, I’m going to start off with ‘Duck Dynasty’ – and holy crap is this show hysterical. Not only have these guys made a fortune on something that is important to them, but they even end each episode with what they’ve learned from the “day”. I haven’t seen a show do that since I used to watch Arthur as a kid, and I have never seen it in a reality show. Everything this family does is comedic genius, whether they mean it to be or not. While Phil and Jase are hands-down two of my favorites (no offense, Willie), it’s Si that takes home the gold for the most outrageous person on reality TV. And by outrageous I mean: freaking hilarious, what the hell is he thinking, I hope I’m that cool when I’m that old.
So if you haven’t watched this show by now, you really must. I am convinced I can’t do it any justice via blog, so you’ll just have to take my word for it. But if it’s numbers you’re looking for, ‘Duck Dynasty’ Season 3 finale had 9.6 million viewers. That many people can’t be wrong, so just listen to me and the numbers and give it a shot. If you don’t like it, then maybe there’s something wrong with you.
And now for the hard-sell. If you took my word with ‘Duck Dynasty’ then you have to give ‘What Would Ryan Lochte Do’ a shot. Why? Because the developers behind the show at E! are brilliant. Straight up brilliant. Not only is the show designed to mock Rylan Lochte, known more so for being one of the sexiest douchebags in America rather than for his swimming, but none of us are quite sure if Lochte is aware of that. At all.
This show was first brought to my attention from one of my good friends who lives in Gainesville, FL, which is the same area that Lochte lives. As well as the home for the University of Florida, Lochte’s alma mater.
Just throw this a bit more into perspective: Ryan Lochte is a 28-year-old Olympian who lives in a college town with his 22-year-old brother and still hangs out at college bars, hits on girls who just might not be legal to drink, and has a posse. If after that run-on sentence you don’t believe that there is the potential for a great reality show, then you should just stop reading now. I will admit, the first five minutes of the first episode I was almost cringing. He seemed so awkward yet full of himself and I couldn’t figure why I would subject myself to 30 minutes of this garbage. Yet, I kept on trucking and I’m so glad I did.
My aforementioned friend who lives in Gainesville was watching this catastrophe at the same time as I and we decided to text each other our thoughts as the show progressed. Not only was I in tears by the end of the show from laughing so hard, but our conversation had gone from “haha, wow he’s stupid” to “HAHAHA I WONDER HOW MANY TIMES SOMEONE HAD TO EXPLAIN THE WORD ‘IDIOSYNCRASIES’ TO HIM!” It is blatant that the show is exploiting him for his dim-witted ways, but what is nice to see is that his family members (who are also featured on this show) tries to stick up for him a bit and help him along the path to being a normal human being like the rest of us.
In the end, I am obsessed with this show and can’t wait to see how they continue to exploit him for the entertainment of the free world. But if “JEAH!” becomes the new “YOLO!” (which I really don’t think it will) I might just have a heart-attack from all the stupid. Give the show a shot. You might like it, you might die from brain-cells rotting; but either way, it is some fine entertainment if you’re in a dark place and need to feel better about yourself.